An Ordinary Girl's World: Fashion, Love, Life

• If I can't give my all in a relationship, I shouldn't be in it. People I care about and that I know care about me deserve the time and effort I need to bring the relationship to 100% and not 50%.

• I am a lot stronger than I appear to be. I may groan about whatever life throws at me, it may appear to totally shake my beliefs and destroy my self esteem, but at the end of it all I will come out in one piece. I will survive.

• My heart is not irreparably broken. It is still full of so much love despite all the experiences that have tried to take this love away.

• My dreams are not just talk. I do have the potential to achieve them and the desire and ability to see them through. I learnt this from this blog. I count this among one of my biggest personal achievements of the past year, and many people who know me will agree. I am the sort of person that has big dreams and visions and starts off really strong but soon loses the will to follow through. As a result I have a lot of half-finished projects left behind in the path of my life, but I am so happy to say that this blog is not and will not be one of them. My love for writing and self expression got me started on this blog but what keeps me coming back is the fact that I know you are here my darling devotees. You are the ones who get me through the rough patches when I feel myself begin to stray and the fact I am still motivated to continue blogging really is a testimony to the beautiful people you all are.

• Although I strive for more from my life and desire to be better, I really am beautiful the way I am now. I find this is true for all the people I know. It is all about loving self love. If you love yourself, I find that you can and will be able to love others more.

• Never settle for anything less than what I deserve: I mean I've already got high standards for myself. If I get anything below a B+ in subjects I'm generally not good in like the sciences, and anything less than an A in subjects I am good in like literature, and other arty subjects, I practically berate myself. But, when it comes to guys, for whatever reason, I allow my standards to fall. I dated someone that I knew wasn't who I should be with, and stayed with them just because it was comfortable. You know it's bad when someone who doesn't even know your boyfriend tells you (through the aid of tarrot cards, no less), that you need to raise your standards where men are concerned. Needless to say it ended badly (reminiscent of stalker-ex boyfriend movies) and I can now honestly say I've never appreciated being single so much before. It was very scary but at least I've learnt from this experience.
  


• Give myself a break: I really am my own harshest critic and after having several people (including one of my oldest friends and several of my academic advisors when I told them how I wanted to complete 2 degrees and a minor in 3 years) tell me that I really do push myself too hard, I decided that its ok to give myself a break every once in awhile. Also, that I should learn to adapt my personal standards to every different situation.
  


• Become more accepting of myself: To some this may sound like the last point but its really not. You see, after having breathing difficulties and being disagnosed with asthma, I was told that I show a lot of the symptoms associated with adult ADHD (attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder). ADHD occurs because a difference in the chemicals and the positioning of neurons and neurochemicals in the brain.

Common symptoms include: carelessness and lack of attention to detail,
continually starting new tasks before finishing old ones,poor organisational skills, inability to focus, or prioritise, lateness to activities, continually losing, or misplacing, things,forgetfulness, inability to complete tasks or stick with tasks, and sometimes depression as a result of the condition. Its not a disease but a developmental disorder and apparently I've probably had it since I was a little kid, but was diagnosed since in girls its usually shows in their quiet and dreamy demeanor instead of the more disruptive forms. I'm getting officially tested soon but either way, I've decided I'm just going to learn to work with it and be more accepting of things that I just can't do.

• Do more of the things I like and not what I think I should do: I almost became a double major in journalism just because I thought it would look good. I was so convinced that it was the right thing to do, that it took me several days of career testing and interest evaluating for me to realise that I want to be my own boss and I just can't do that in traditional print journalism. I still love media literacy and writing though, so I'm a film studies minor instead of an journalism double major.

So goodbye 2009. Thanks for the memories.

But before I end this unusually long post (I'm sorry. I got a little carried away), here are some of the links that inspired me this week:

• Get up and Go...to the café: Ah, the café. The stereotypical artist haven, where those seeking inspiration go to observe life in a cosy, warm and friendly environment. This article by Café Fashionista has moved me to rediscover the magic of my neighbourhood café.



• Maybe its just me, but I think using Kool-aid as clothing dye is pretty fascinating. This is one of the DIY projects I want to try out as soon as possible.



• Need somewhere cute to keep your supplies? The monkeybasket blog has just the thing.

Love you all and Stay inspired,

P.S. So let me know what you think. Did the year go by too fast? What did you learn from your past experiences this year? Did you learn anything new about yourself this year and if so, what? Feel free to let me know in the comments below.